


Justice

by imaginaryfriendashkun



Series: Psychopath Diary - Fragments [14]
Category: Psychopath Diary (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, Cop Yook Dong Sik, Cops and Criminals, Corruption, Dead In Woo, Dealing With Loss, Depression, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Major Whump, Major character death - Freeform, Psychological Trauma, Revenge, Sad Ending, Suicide Attempt, Support From Family, Tragedy, Trauma, Trigger Warnings, support from friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:35:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27455086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginaryfriendashkun/pseuds/imaginaryfriendashkun
Summary: Yook Dong Sik loses his lover, husband, Seo In Woo in an accident and goes down the wrong path. Or so, Bo Kyung thinks. But there is always more when it comes to Dong Sik.
Relationships: Seo In Woo/Yook Dong Sik
Series: Psychopath Diary - Fragments [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1627363
Comments: 2
Kudos: 31





	Justice

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: All rights reserved. No part of these pages, either text or image may be used for any purpose other than personal use. Reproduction, modification, storage in a retrieval system or retransmission, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical or otherwise, for reasons other than personal use, is strictly prohibited without prior written permission. 
> 
> All mistakes - plot, grammar, characterization, situation descriptions - are mine. Not beta'd. Let me know if there are glaring problems, I want to improve :)
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING - Please do not read if you are triggered by depression or suicide attempt.

"I didn't know, Yook Dong Sik-ssi, that you were capable of killing 4 people and staging their murder in cold blood. No evidence left behind. No proof and you are plotting to kill two more. The last one of the gang and the one who is blackmailing you."

Dong Sik feels small under her gaze, her judging gaze.

He says weakly, "I a-am a, a _cop,_ after all."

"Yes, yes you are. But you are the cop who doesn't like violence. You don't like being on the field. You don't like chasing down criminals. You don't like using guns. You prefer to profile and solve using your brains rather than physical means. You prefer doing the ground work, the back stage work."

"You are extremely smart, empathetic. Are all of these just a façade? I didn't realize that you were capable of something so psychopath like. Involving yourself, killing innocent people so easily without any care in the world."

Dong Sik doesn't say anything. There are unshed tears in his eyes and there is something more, anger. Unlike Dong Sik's usual soft self.

Bo Kyung continues cruelly, trying to get a reaction from him. "Were they weak? Easy prey? Did you want to fulfil In Woo-ssi's unfulfilled desires? Even he didn't want to hurt anyone because of _you._ He buried his nasty tendencies deep, so he could stay with you. Why would you do something even he wouldn't have wanted? He wouldn't have wanted to do it. He wouldn't have wanted _you_ to do it, either."

Bo Kyung never knew - when In Woo was alive - that she would say words of support for In Woo, like this. But the situation is so bad that it calls for it. Why is Dong Sik going around killing people? 

Dong Sik is dealing with loss but nothing justifies killing people. Nothing. She never expected something like this from someone like Dong Sik. Where did she go wrong? Where did he go wrong? Where did they go wrong? Did Dong Sik lose himself because of In Woo's death? Is he trying to fulfill In Woo's sick desires? What is _wrong?_

Dong Sik shakes his head, "D-don't talk talk about him." He can't even hear or tell In Woo's name. The loss is still new and raw and it hurts, a lot.

"You lost your right to ask something like this from me, Yook Dong Sik-ssi."

"Did you do it for promotion? You wanted to go up the ladder that bad?" Bo Kyung pokes where it hurts.

She is just fishing for reasons. She knows him but she is doubting everything now.

Dong Sik cries, "If- if- if- I-h-had been at the top of the ladder of food chain, none of this would h-have happened, Bo Kyung-ssi."

Dong Sik has more tears in his eyes but Bo Kyung forces herself to go on. 

"Why would you do that to those people? What did they ever do to you or anyone else other than the fact that they were rich brats? Now, someone else knows that it is you who has killed those four and is blackmailing you. Trying to extort money from you, hurt your close ones. Don't you feel responsible? Guilty? Or is that also _not_ there? Are you so gone?"

"I didn't realize you would not get caught the first four times. You have changed so much. How did you make sure that you weren't caught? Just how? Which is the real you, Yook Dong Sik? The genius, humble, meek, pushover cop or this cold blooded murderer? Did you stop Seo In Woo-ssi because you knew how it felt? Did you discover his tendencies because you both are similar somehow? Is that how you were able to help him suppress his tendencies?"

Bo Kyung's words pierce Dong Sik. He cries, "They a-are not- _not..._ innocent. They are not, not."

He breaks down.

Bo Kyung wants to comfort him, to hug him, to take care of him but she holds her back. There are a lot of unanswered questions. She can't give in now. For her sake, for Dong Sik's sake, for In Woo's sake, for Taek Soo's, Chil Sung's and the victims'.

Dong Sik looks at her with his teary, wide, brown, large doe eyes.

Does she not even have a small sliver of doubt about him? They have known each other for nearly four years. She has been through with him a lot. 

He knows about her dad's condition. She knows about In Woo. She was there when he started dating In Woo despite his suppressed psychopath tendencies. They always looked out for each other.

He doesn't blame her though. She thinks he was influenced by In Woo, that he has lost reason because of In Woo's death. That he wants to live like In Woo, that he wants to fulfill everything that In Woo wanted but couldn't.

To live in in Woo's memories, to live as and for In Woo.

Bo Kyung snorts, "They are not innocent? Liar. You have always been a bad liar, Dong Sik-ssi."

She needs clarity, she wants it right now. She can't let anything go.

Dong Sik hiccups. "Th-they were the ones who killed him in the accident and left me to bleed, bleed, _bleed_ and die." He whispers. He can't even bring himself to say In Woo's name out loud.

Bo Kyung goes deathly pale. "What?"

How much abuse and agony must he have gone through to think that killing the people who killed his lover for revenge is normal... made him think that it is all right killing another person. Not one but four.

But that doesn't make it OK, right?

Dong Sik nods and looks away. He massages his leg, it hurts. It is one of the after effects of the accident.

He can't stand or walk for long. It is bad during rainy days. He is sitting down now but it still hurts because he is being emotional. It happens from time to time, constantly reminding himself of what happened that fateful night, everything was ruined so easily. It is not physical, it is psychosomatic. 

Bo Kyung glares at Dong Sik. "You remembered something and didn't let me know? Let us know? Do you know how desperately Taek Soo, Chil Sung and I have been working? How? Why? We could have helped catch and put them in jail."

Dong Sik hits his head on the wall he is leaning against. He stretches his leg and laughs in defeat.

"Bo Kyung-ssi, do- do- do you hear yourself? They are rich heirs. There is no evidence. They destroyed it. No proof. No CCTV footage. My word and memory are the only statement. The court will not accept it. They will rule it out, making me- me- me insane or mentally unstable or something. I don't have the money or strength to fight. In Woo's family won't help. I- I- I don't want to drag you or my my family into this."

"T-th-they were drunk and and and ran over In Woo when we were on a date, just- just after I proposed to him. No camera. No CCTV. Nothing. Haha. Nothing. No DNA. No sample. I- I- I shouldn't have taken him to somewhere so lonely- lonely."

"Th-th-they made me watch him him die slowly. Even though I told them I w-wo-won't tell the cops. I begged them to- to save him. That they could kill me. They could h-h-have saved at least hm. If they had- had called ambulance on time, he would have been alive now. They watched him- him bleed. He was paralyzed and we were for-forced to look at each other till h-h-he took his last breath. I told him to stop being a psychopath. He could-could have fought back but he couldn't, he didn't. They didn't even give him a chance. Or me."

"T-they then proceeded to beat me to death and left. They didn't even look back."

Dong Sik feels like puking, he feels like he can't breathe, his anxiety and panic attacks are better than before but are still there. He places his head between his knees and gently rocks himself. He can't black out, not now, _not now. He is so close to finishing all this._

The memories of that night haunt him, haunt him when he is awake, when he tries to sleep and renders him physically useless.

He can function properly only if he really concentrates and uses his will power to solve crimes or put down criminals.

Dong Sik forces himself to continue. He takes a deep breath. "If- if- if- it had been me who had been hit... he... he... he could have taken them down and saved me. He would have, for su-su-sure."

"But- but- but... I was weak and hated violence and fi-fighting and failed my physical and was scouted more for my ge-genius brain and let- let- let myself get beat up. Let- let myself watch the man I love be killed slowly, painfully, c-cruelly, mer-mercilessly. Right in front of my eyes. He tried to teach me self d-defense so many times. He did and I- I f-failed him."

"It was my fault, my _fault._ I was was weak, disgusting, my fault."

He hits his head again and again, ignoring Bo Kyung's voice, ignoring her attempts to stop him. He deserves worse.

"The reason I stutter now, have a a speech disorder, can't s-sleep, am alone, can't w-walk without support, can't l-love anyone else, al-almost gave up on my police job, am a m-murderer is those five."

He lowers his voice and realizes he is panting, wheezing heavily.

He looks at her dead in the eyes, "A-are are they still _innocent?"_

They aren't but Dong Sik isn't innocent anymore either.

He knows that she is going to arrest him. That she won't let him kill the last one.

He goes on before she can say something. "Pl-pl-please... can can you wait? Just just for sometime. Till I get my revenge on the last one. Only one is left. P-please. I will surrender myself. Four or five, my s-sentence will be the same."

"Yook Dong Sik, you have done _enough."_

He deflates. Does he have to fight her and escape? Will he be able to kill the last one with her and the other cops hot on his tail? He can try. He doesn't want to give up.

He is already a murderer, what more does she want? He can't go back. Why? _**Why?**_

Dong Sik is startled as he hears her next question. 

"Did you enjoy it? Did it satisfy you? Did you want to torture them?"

He pales.

He hates talking or thinking about it. He has enough problems with his eating, speech and sleeping disorder as it is. He doesn't want to recap and talk about how he killed them, how he felt when he killed them.

She stares at him expectantly, he closes his eyes and lets his mind wander. It is a prison inside his mind. He is stuck in a never endless black hole of a loop.

He puked and got fever after his first two kills. Didn't torture them, didn't want to. Couldn't. It was quick, clumsy, messy. His forensic knowledge helped him clean up after wards and not get caught. He covered his traces meticulously.

He almost got himself killed because of his leg. He almost killed himself too.

There was no satisfaction because In Woo can't be revived anyway. In Woo won't come back to him. For him. In Woo left him alone to deal with all this shit.

He came home and curled under the hot shower, scrubbed and scrubbed and _scrubbed_ so much, the blood didn't wash off easily. The feeling of holding the gun he bought from the black market didn't let go easily.

Thoughts of In Woo's diary haunted him further. In Woo maintained a diary for therapy, he wrote about his torture methods, it was a therapy journal. He wrote so that he won't enact it.

Dong Sik wanted them to suffer like In Woo wrote in his diary, he wanted them to be in pain but knew he couldn't dish it out to them.

He just didn't want to stay weak and let anyone else hurt his family.

They were capable of hurting him and his family, coming after them in cold blood. They believed his memory loss lie but they are not ones to take risks. They wouldn't sit simply for long so he took the first step instead and went after them.

They caught on after the first two kills.

But Dong Sik also learned and adapted and finished the third and fourth quickly, giving them no cooling period. Giving himself no cooling period. He couldn't rest. They would murder everyone else he treasured. They are predators, disgusting ones at the top of the food chain. And he ended up becoming a disgusting murderer too. He failed himself. He failed In Woo. He failed his friends and family.

He hated it always, being on watch, on look out, trying to deceive people, no peace, only anxiety, so much pressure, so many negative feelings. But he didn't have a choice. He had to move fast, no time for rest or break or pity.

Bo Kyung breaks the silence again. So that was why there was no torture marks on the victims' bodies. Dong Sik didn't enjoy it, a part of her knew but she wanted to confirm it.

"Who is it? The one who is blackmailing you?"

Dong Sik chuckles. "A cop I put away for corruption."

"Kim Hyun Jae?"

He nods. "Yes... yes. He-he-he probably was not satisfied that I didn't die. He always wanted re-re-revenge on me, he was always d-digging for dirt on me. He never-"

Bo Kyung whispers, "He never found it... until now."

Dong Sik nods. 

Of course, no one would be able to find anything against Dong Sik. He is squeaky clean and straight laced and innocent, extremely honest and straight forward. At least, till now.

"You didn't answer my question, Dong Sik-ssi."

"I wanted to enjoy it but d-d-d-didn't." Of course, nothing escapes from Bo Kyung.

"You need to stop."

"I w-w-w-want to but I can't. I w-w-won't. I refuse to. Not until the last person is also down."

"Dong Sik-ssi."

"They will come and kill me. And- and- and my family, maybe even you and Chil Sung-ssi and Taek Soo-ssi. I don't want t-to be weak anymore. I don't want to lose anyone el-else. P-please. I just want this all to end. I can't last m-much longer. T-this is the only way to put this to stop. P-please."

He has lost his inherent goodness that kindness that helped stop Seo In Woo from becoming a psychopath. He has become a killer himself. He is _not_ good. He is not kind. He has sinned.

In Woo will be disappointed, right? Dong Sik has become the very thing he didn't want In Woo to become. Could he have chosen differently? Trying to survive, to live, to fit in has made him into something like this, _unrecognizable._ He should have died that day instead. Along with In Woo. Or instead of In Woo. He should have killed himself instead of being what he is now.

In Woo would probably have had better control if he had survived instead of Dong Sik. He would have tried not to kill the bastards because he wouldn't have wanted to tarnish Dong Sik's memories and their promises.

"Dong Sik-ssi."

"I am not nice, not kind. I a-a-m-a-m-am am a bad person. I am a-a-a _m-monster."_

"You are not."

"Yes - I am."

"No."

"Huh... what?" Did he hear that correctly? He stares at her and she stares back.

"I would have done the same thing to the killer who hurt my father."

"You didn't, you w-w-were strong enough to put him in jail. You didn't give up. You were strong. You fought. I-I- I am not."

"Some bad people can't be put away in jail, Yook Dong Sik-ssi."

"Huh?" Has he finally lost it? Is he hallucinating?

Is he hearing this correctly? Is this Shim Bo Kyung?

"I am going to help you, Dong Sik-ssi."

Dong Sik shakes his head frantically. "No! No! No! I don't want you to be involved in this. Can't drag you into this and make you into something d-di-dirty."

"You are far from dirty, Dong Sik."

She sighs. "I didn't like In Woo but he made you happy. He tried to stay good for your sake. Till the end, he kept his promise. I doubted him always and could never tell him properly that I was grateful to him for being by your side. I couldn't protect him or my father. I failed them both but I won't fail you."

"I have already failed, I should have taken better care of you but not anymore, I won't fail you anymore, Yook Dong Sik-ssi."

"We, not you, we are putting the fifth one and Hyun Jae against each other. We, not just you, are going to finish this and see this through. Taek Soo and Chil Sung will also help us. You have suffered enough, all alone, been through enough and this has to stop - right now!"

**********

"Dong Sik-ssi. It is over. That is enough." Bo Kyung says softly.

Chil Sung adds, "You are not telling anyone about this. Don't confess to any of these crimes."

Taek Soo nods. Hyun Jae and the fifth bastard are dead. They are going to close the case saying that the fifth one killed his friends, the corrupt cop tried to blackmail him after finding out by mistake. They went against each other and killed each other.

Dong Sik faints in their arms.

**********

"Dong Sik-ssi, I am going to stop bothering you from today. You left the force six months back and I bothered you every day, came for you, hoping you will come back because we need you to help people." Bo Kyung says.

Dong Sik smiles. His escape room is doing well but the feeling of wanting to help people, that urge is always there. He has decided.

He was extremely angry, very much furious that Bo Kyung kept visiting and bugging him for help even though she and her team are good at solving things on their own, without him. He wanted to forget everything but the three of them didn't leave him alone.

But now, he doesn't want her to stop. He doesn't want Chil Sung and Taek Soo to stop. He is still guilty and blames himself but he wants to help people out there so that there are no more victims like him. He doesn't want to create more victims.

There are many victims with no voice, some forced to become murderers. He himself is a fine example. He had help to over come it but it has left a big scar on him which he will never be able to forget.

He doesn't wish it on others, even on his enemy and he will continue to work hard to reduce this even if only by a small percent. He will continue.

**Author's Note:**

> Please DO NOT REPOST my fics without my permission. Kindly ask me before hand for translations. Credit my work/profile Ao3/Wattpad URL without fail. I am on AO3 ([imaginaryfriendashkun](https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginaryfriendashkun/pseuds/imaginaryfriendashkun)) and Wattpad ([alien/imaginaryfriendashkun](https://www.wattpad.com/user/alienfriendashkun)) and Youtube ([Ash Kun](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEWO5kWpuGFJzdSV0LTLGKg?view_as=subscriber)) and Tumblr([imaginaryfriendashkun](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/imaginaryfriendashkun)) and not on any other platform
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> Stay safe, take care, be happy.


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